I just called

I'm not going to even get into how you ended up texting me one night just as I was finishing a walk.

The whole thing is so bizarre, so... well, unbelievable.

I wondered over and over again how you knew...

You'd say things...and I'd think: "Is she inside my house?"

How did you get into my head.

And then I realized...our minds are the same... they work the same way.

That … that NEVER happens. Hasn't happened.

And... well, we texted. And I smiled. And my darkness left and a bright light came into me and I still hadn't met you.

Until that night.

When you sent me … you know what you sent me.

And... and... I knew.

The person with that mind. The person who did THAT... I had to meet her. Had to meet you.

I knew it didn't make sense. None of it did. Meeting you seemed...well, unlikely. And then, what?

Still.

We texted back and forth. Half-arranged meetings...

"tomorrow after my event?" "sure"

Didn't happen.

"Can I bring you a coffee?" "Yes!"

No

On and on.

And then... we finally set a firm time. A firm date. A real place. A DATE. I had a DATE with you.

Nothing had really made sense since that first night of your text...so, well, ok. We had a DATE.

I didn't even sleep the night before. I just imagined sitting across from you. Your eyes on mine.

Hearing your voice...I'd never even heard your voice.

I got out of bed early. And you'd already texted me. I knew... I was going to meet HER...meet YOU.

Back and forth, laughing, smiling...

I'm on the way.

And.... you can't. Well, you could, but … well, could we later?

And I'm all: Ok, sure...it's fine.

And rearrange my day.

And later comes...and no word from you.

And later... and then I text and then you say nothing...and then finally

Sorry...you can't.

You can't

Which to me means you won't...aren't going to.

You know enough.

Of course you won't

I wouldn't.

I'd want to, but I wouldn't...not if I had been you

And then you're sorry... and I'm ...well, angry.

But I tell you it's ok

I don't want to lose you completely.

Those words on an illuminated screen have kept me going... I can't lose that.

And we text and it's just like it was. Like the entire day I had planned for and rearranged for and had cancelled...not once, but twice...like it never even happened.

And … I thought, maybe, maybe, maybe...if I call she'll say yes and actually do it. You'll say yes..

Plus, I'll hear her voice.

I hate the phone.

I've called one other woman EVER in my life for a date. Just once.

But, I call. I take a shot of bourbon, and I call. And you don't answer and there's no voicemail.

This is days later, by the way. When I can't stand it anymore.

If there's 1/10 of 1% of a chance you'll say yes, then...ok, ok, I'll call. Even then, maybe you won't show up...but, if the words come out of your mouth, I'm betting you will.

So, I called. And you didn't answer. But you called back. 10 minutes, 20, 45, and I ask. And you say yes. Tomorrow. The next day. I'll see you tomorrow...

And tomorrow comes and you text me and I text you and we confirm all details and I drive and you arrive and YOU arrive and we hug like we've been friends for 100 years.

And you arrive.

And you arrive.

And it's like in the movies and there's the light and I can't believe it and I smile and I smile and my heart jumps

And I held you... and we hugged and …

We talk and we talk and we talk and we talk

And I take you home and we laugh and I haven't laughed in so long haven't really, truly laughed.

and, well, the rest... the rest...

From that day on... the longest period of complete happiness in my life. EVER

Yes, it ended. I said the words...you made it stop.

But. I just called.

Took that tiny chance.

And you said YES … even though by then you knew enough... even though I knew it probably couldn't be... if I could just SEE you ...just once.

And it was more than once and it was heaven and I will never forget … and I hope you smile when you think of it... I hope you smile inside when you think of our brief time...our one minute together.

I just called.